im dead..

I love him.. that's why i don't want to hurt him. i don't want to see him feeling so bad. i can't even let him get mad.

but..just like what they say, there's no perfect relationship. lovers fight, and they will always do.

i admit, it was my fault. i made a mistake.. a simple mistake that took off his trust from me.

he don't want me to go to a friend's house, and play with these buddies (i can't name).. he said i'm not supposed to mingle with some of those people, especially because they were boys and he don't trust them. he also said that he knows them more than i do..

what he doesn't know is that, i use to go there almost everyday. we play uno cards and the thing called killer2..that most of the time, we almost went home late. he don't know, because i never told him..because i know he'll just get mad.

until somebody told him about it. someone close to him who just happen to dropped by our friend's house.. he saw us there, having fun.

i know that time would come.. that he would eventually know all those things. when he confronted me, i told him the truth, everything.. that i simply go there just to play. i even told him that these people were nice, and we're not doing anything against the rule. and as expected, he didn't accept my explanations. we had a hard time arguing.

i dont know.. why can't he understand my side? he said he just wants the best for me.. for my own good.

i just can't let it all left hanging.. but what should i do?


it felt like i was stock in the middle.. i can't let the arguments for long, so i end it up with a sorry. and he again forbid me to go there..never again. even if it's hard, i said i won't do it again. (even if it means goodbye uno, goodbye killer-killer..goodbye my friends) because i love him.. and nothing really matters more than him. i may lost the joy of playing and of having fun.. but not the love that we have shared,, the feeling of worth, and happiness i can only felt because of him.

sometimes, you have to choose what is really important to you. you have to give up something even if it makes you happy..giving it up may sometimes be painful, but you have to.. in exchange for something worthwhile.